Living in Sin ( in Brazil)

[nonstopnarcissist]

Messages

Calendar

(1) ONGOING ; (8) COMPLETED

THREADS

☑ TEXT ; BRUCE BANNER

Bruce comes home- Tony goes to Brazil

☑ ACTION ; BRUCE BANNER

A heartfelt reunion

☑ TEXT ; BRUCE BANNER

Picking up a truck

☑ ACTION ; BRUCE BANNER

Rebuilding a relationship

☑ TEXT ; BRUCE BANNER

Are we boyfriends?

☑ TEXT ; BRUCE BANNER

Of Snuggles and Struggles

☑ ACTION ; BRUCE BANNER

Progress Report

☑ TEXT ; BRUCE BANNER

You want to gag me?

❏ ACTION ; BRUCE BANNER

The Ross Issue

MESSAGES

Bruce Banner 01-01-2018

HoneyBear 01-03-2018

Bruce Banner Date of text

Me You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously

Bruce Um, apologies.
Just letting you know I'm back on Earth?
I don't know if you can twist that but I believe innuendo is your secret superpower.

Me Popped back up from subspace? No, that's not your scene. Heaven's a strip club?
...
Where are you?

Bruce I don't know if it's physically possible for it to be my scene.
Brazil. Thor said I was gone for a while.
I'm sorry about that, Tony.

Me In the name of science, we could probably test that. No it's probably better that you weren't here for the latest dustup. Everything's gotten infinitely more complicated.

Bruce You can't just use the name of science like that against me. That's cheating.
...
...
...
I was The Other Guy the whole time that I was gone.
I didn't come back to Bruce until a few weeks ago.
I don't know what's going to happen now.

Me I am a dirty cheater on occasion, Honeybear, you shouldn't be surprised by now.
You were the Hulk for more than two years? Where, exactly, in Brazil are you? I'm coming to visit.

Bruce As far as I can follow, I crashed the Quinjet (sorry) into this intergalactic scrap yard.
Apparently there are are portals scattered across the galaxies to help the people on this planet hook ships in.
Which honestly has some pretty amazing implications that I would love the time and energy to explore.
I was basically a Gladiator for those two years.
They'd have me fight for audiences. That was how Thor found me.

Me I'll bring you to the lab, plenty of time and energy for exploration there.
Bruce- your evasion kung fu is weak. Don't make me trace the phone, I don't want to have to do that.
...
Please.

Bruce What happens if I turn and can't get back?
I've been working on herbal remedies. Meditation. I nearly had it under control, before everything else.
...
Up north, in Amapá.
I have a nice little cabin here in the forest. It's by a waterfall, very tranquil.

Me I talk him down. Without Veronica; he can be talked down, the lullaby worked- and hey. Maybe he'll have missed me.
Give me an hour, I'll be down there with your teas and the research you left behind.

Bruce An hour sounds like you're pushing it.
Maybe you made upgrades but I'd rather you not kill yourself trying to get there.
If you explode before you get here I'll be upset. And we know what happens when I get upset.
...
Maybe he missed you.
I know I did.

Me Are you doubting my new tech? It's light, tight, and runs off multiple mini-reactors.
...
Missed you too, Mean and Green. Things went...off the rails pretty bad while you were away.

Bruce And it can carry tea too?
Forgive my skepticism.

Me Specialized compartment meant for ammo, haven't actually designed the guns yet so- empty space that needs filling. I'm flying over the ocean with a little of you in me.

Bruce Please don't text and fly, Tony.
You know that makes me nervous.

I can't believe you're bringing me tea.

Me It's voice to text, I'm dictating, FRIDAY is texting. It's perfectly safe, Grumpy-Bear.

Well it's what you always had to calm yourself down after the fact.

Bruce I forgot that JARVIS is his own person now.
I still feel like this counts as distracted -- suiting.

Do you need coordinates or is your superior tech going to hone in on me.

Me Vision isn't Jarvis. There's the framework of him there but it's not really him.
Coordinates will make it easier to find you and I'd appreciate them.

Bruce If we know anything, it's that I'm bad with tech and should leave it alone.

I'll send coordinates your way.

Me Wrong lesson. 'Rushing the framework of a world changing AI is not something done under duress.' I had witchy fingers in my brain that entire time; took awhile to realize it but-

I mean, didn't I seem a little more desperate than usual to you? To get it to work.

Bruce You get a certain way when you get worked up over something new. Over building something.

I'd say it's how you work through your stress, like I do with meditation but please remember that I'm not THAT kind of doctor (no matter how many times you try to have a therapy session with me, Anthony).

I wanted to make it work, too. I know how hard I pushed -- and how hard I pushed other people trying to find a cure for the GAMMA.
We both rushed it.

Me We weren't anywhere near a chance at stable integration. Nowhere near. Ultron is what happens when you mix AI and magic and hope the megalomaniacal sentient gem will listen to you. It shouldn't have worked. We were- I was at the 'throwing myself against a wall' stage.

Brucie-bear, have you considered that maybe I tell you what's happening in my life not for therapy, but because you're my friend and I want you to know what's making me crazy in that particular moment? Just saying.

You've never really pushed in a way I didn't want or ask for. It's fine.

Bruce A lot makes you crazy, and for very good reasons. But I'm not going to pop up after two years and change and tell you you should probably have a professional to talk to.

Okay why bear? Why am I a bear, why is that your pet name of choice with me?

Me You're just so damn huggable, I thought you knew?

Bruce All right, I'll take it. It's better than most alternatives.

What is your ETA?

Me Give me a quarter of a bottle of scotch and an hour and I'll get you a few new mortifying nicknames.

Quarter of an hour. You probably won't see me so I'll knock, the stealth tech on this suit is as good if not better than what I had on the Quinjet you borrowed.

Bruce Have I mentioned lately that I'm sorry about the Quinjet? Because I really, really am.

I don't have scotch, just tea.
I actually don't have a ton in the house, um.
Not great at grocery shopping when it's just me.

Me Forgiven and forgotten, honestly. You needed it more than we did and it kept you safe. That's what matters.

I'll have to find something else intoxicating to dip into, then. I'm creative, I'll figure something out.

Bruce Knew you were a soft touch, at heart.

I can run into town and get dinner for us. If you want to lurk in the woods and be invisible for a little while after you get here.

Though I shouldn't enable your bad habits.

Me Tell no one. It'll ruin my reputation.
I'll be your personal guardian angel. Hunt away. Pretty sure you're not supposed to have this tea on an empty stomach anyway.

Send

HoneyBear He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.

Me Oh now, how dare he pay you a compliment. That's my job.

HoneyBear I guess I'm just not used to compliments?
This is what I get for being a hermit.

Though technically it was aimed at you, because of course it was.
I was gathering your dead-sea-scroll shopping list of tech parts and he said I must be really smart to use all this.

Me What, I want to build us a working wifi connection that's encrypted so we can stream data from the compound and the tower's old archives. That takes things.

And tools.

And coffee- did you get the high pressure fittings? I'm pimping out your percolator.

HoneyBear I know, I know, tech wizard.

I got the high pressure fittings for the coffee maker that only you will use.

And clothes for you. You wear a small, right?

Me My tailor in new york is suddenly ill and has no idea why. Smalls, mediums, whatever as long as it's comfortable. It is so hot here I have lost the last of the fucks I can give about clothing.

Seriously, sitting here in the house, trying to rewire your lights, naked.

HoneyBear Do my lights need rewiring?
That doesn't sound like a safe thing to do naked.

All right I think I have everything.
Including real coffee and warm weather clothing for you.
Nothing is tailored, you'll have to survive.

Me Everything needs rewiring, this shack is an electrician's nightmare. How it hasn't gone up in flames yet is a mystery to me.

Nothing says incognito like wearing what the locals wear. Maybe I'll work on my tan later while I wait for you to get back.

HoneyBear Please have pants on while working with electricity???

What do you want for dinner.
Yes, I'm making you eat.
Yes, it's going to be "hippy food".

Me Pants are for other people, Banner. Just wait until I get some kind of AC rigged for us, no more sweating into your tea.

Food.
If you must.
My kingdom for a cheeseburger.

HoneyBear I bet if I made you a black bean burger you wouldn't even notice.
But I can do cheeseburgers.
I am not McDonalds, but I can at least cook ground meat and cheese.

Me I'd argue the point, but you're right. As long as it is cheeseburger adjacent I won't mind.

HoneyBear I will make you a proper American double cheeseburger If you agree to eat whatever sides I make to go with it

Me That sounds ominous, but sure, what the hell.

On a different note: I can probably rig a solar array for the shack, get some green energy going.

HoneyBear I know, salads are spooky.

Sounds like you mean to stay for a little while, if you're rigging up green energy.

Me I need time away. Rhodey can handle negotiations with the accords, I can conference call business with Pepper if I need to but I don't think they're expecting me back for at least a month.

I'm overdue a sabbatical.

HoneyBear I'll take a month.

We should probably invest in some sort of vehicle, just as a thought.
I can only carry so much on my bike, and if you're doing renovations, we may need more carrying power.

Me Find an old beat up truck, make an offer, I'll give you the cash for it tomorrow. Fixing it up will give me something to do. It's been awhile since I've revived a car.

HoneyBear Make offer on crappy truck, got it.
You've been here less than 48 hours and already you have thirteen projects running simultaneously.
This is a vacation, remember?

Me And idle hands are the devil's playthings. I don't do still very well, Brucie-bear, I need some kind of stimulation otherwise I'll start tearing out my hair.

HoneyBear Or mine. I can only serve as so much of a distraction.

I think I found us a truck for a shade over 2k. Acceptable?

Me Well. You would, but then we might have a code green on our hands.

More than. I'll give you the cash when you get back; is it something you can drive here or will I have to find a way to haul it home?

HoneyBear That is a fair question
I haven't driven a car in... a while.
So it's relatively driveable but I don't know that I can drive it.

Me I've got a photostatic veil I can wear, come into town with you and drive it back. No problem.

HoneyBear That sounds complicated but all right.
Come invisibly give me money to buy this truck and drive it back.

Why am I friends with you that I have to construct sentences like that?

Me Because I had you at hello.

Or rather my complimenting your scientific acumen, but, whatever, details.

HoneyBear No, it was definitely at hello.
Or maybe "big green rage monster", you charming bastard you.

All right, I'll send you the address. Come get me, invisible man.

Me You had no idea what to make of me, it was fantastic. 'Who is this crazy, incredibly handsome scientist?'

Give me two shakes.

Send

Code by Yuff and tessisamess